She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
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He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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