He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
