I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize