do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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