He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
love makes seman taste better
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.