No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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