Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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