My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
My vagina is very pro this idea
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
