carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
