break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
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is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
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I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize