you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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