Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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