i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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