It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Pooping to opera.
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