Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize