I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
