I feel great
I just peed on a car
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
