Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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