I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
