Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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