is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
My feet surprised me
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
