I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
