So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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