I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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