is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
