Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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