glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
