...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
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Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
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Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
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