I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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