Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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