it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
When did angry sex become our thing?
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
