spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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