Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
