Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize