Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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