ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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