Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
