Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Randomize
