He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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