How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
