so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
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