Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
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Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
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after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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