I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
