love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize
