come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
