I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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