theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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