I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
