i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
