No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
